A funny thing happened on the way to….

If there is any lesson that I have learned is you can't judge a horserace by its start, but rather draw conclusions from the finish.

In preparation for my flight to Mobile, Alabama, the trials and tribulations of airport demeanor seem to have become almost a rite of passage.

As I, so innocently, was in my pre-flight mode, the same sequence of events began to unfold, almost routinely, which turned out to be anything but. Upon request by the airline counter representative, I matter-of-factly relinquished my Photo ID for inspection purposes and noticed a somewhat bemused expression, almost scorn-like in my direction.

After a momentary pause, the representative exclaimed, "Mr. Johnson, do you realize you are about to expire." Hmmm, I thought, what does she know that I don't. As I was about to give a smart-alec reply, she said my driver's license needed to be renewed soon. THE HORSES HAVE JUST LEFT THE STARTING GATE.

The first leg of the trip was a stopover in Charlotte, North Carolina. The weather was atrocious, and the turbo prop seemed to have stayed in the storm's wake the whole time. In fact, the flight attendant announced, due to unstable conditions, the normal amenities would not be served. Rats, I so wanted to enjoy that iced down diet drink and small pack of pretzels. When the flight attendant strapped herself in for the remainder of the trip, we were practically nose-to-nose facing each other.

The unspoken contest started with neither one of us willing to blink or look away. This reminded me of my former kitten, "Willy," when he first arrived on the scene. The first night, he leaped on the nightstand next to the bed, and for approximately 15 minutes, he and I had a sort of Mexican standoff. Come to think of it, Willie never blinked, either. THE HORSES ARE ROUNDING THE TURN.

Finally, the moment of truth, once our US Air flight from Charlotte landed in the Greater Mobile airport, our designated driver, Chris, greeted us and we were in his capable hands for the remainder of our four-day stay. Geiger & Associates, through Chris, demonstrated their professionalism and quality with exquisite service and attention to detail that kick started our Mobile experience with class and taste that translated into our total enjoyment. Although this particular trip focused on restaurants and golf, Mobile has so much more to offer. It is simply a smorgasbord of anything and everything one could ever want. The intrinsic thread that permeates all aspects of the Mobile experience can be capsulized in primarily one word, affordability.

The central theme of Alabama golf is the Robert Trent Jones Golf Trail, providing quality courses at great value. Initially it was funded by the Retirement Systems of Alabama to enhance the state's tourism as well as entice future retirees to take up residence in the great state of Alabama.

The Robert Trent Jones Trail extends from one end of Alabama to the other and is ranked as the largest golf course construction project in the world. Two of the courses, Rosemary and I played are part of the Robert Trent Jones Trail: Magnolia Grove. The Falls and the Crossings courses, we found to be completely different, but a common thread seemed to prevail at both. Both courses were quite affordable, with great service and attention to detail. "All the women's tee box areas were well flowered and manicured, not just placed in front of the men's tees as an afterthought," Rosemary said.

One example that caught my eye was the Par 5 16^th hole at Magnolia Grove's Crossing layout. There was a split tee area that literally was separated by 200 yards of trees, giving me a completely different view of a sandtrap, devilishly placed to catch a not-so-errant drive. So whether one played from the whites or the tips, a sense of playing from the frying pan or the fire got my juices flowing and was as much of a mental as well as a physical challenge.

What was descriptive and exhilarating about the two courses, is the architect's genius in incorporating existing topography and to never duplicate, so each hole was an entity by itself. Although each hole offered its own type of challenges, trust me, there was never a dull moment.

Across the pond, another fun course we played was a 27-hole layout named Timber Creek, choosing its Magnolia and Pines to test the water. With all the courses played, there was a sense of class, and a desire to make my experience unforgettable. They are so women friendly, and even the pro shop reflects their genuine style of true southern hospitality, offering great selection, at affordable pricing to keep the "dust" off the clothing, not the clubs.

Andy Ray, Timber Creek's Director of Golf, was as funny as he was professional, exuding his sincere desire to make our visit as pleasant and enlightening as possible. To his credit, if he were to say, "Ladies and Gentlemen, start your engines," it comes from his heart.

The most unique aspect (among many others) about the Timber Creek Magnolia property was several of the ladies tees were built on stilts. How the mower person got to them was a challenge by itself. My impression throughout was women were treated as anything but an afterthought. Rosemary was appreciative that although the tee areas were on stilts, cart path access was nearby and no climbing of stairs was necessary.

Most of the holes were tree-lined, but there was an absence of undergrowth and brush, so most misplayed shots were easy to find. This really helps to keep from having slow play, as well as not losing one's ball.

Next, Rock Creek Golf Club was a gorgeous stretch of property. Surrounded by wooded wetlands, its own natural elevation and surrounding trees and foliage gave a balance of natural hazards, complementing the magnificent beauty throughout its playing area.

Not only were the rangers there to help move play and spot balls, they also offered amenities like ice cold succulent apples and cold towels. They even provided tips on where to hit layups and the like because subtle elevation changes were the order of the day.

Although Rock Creek is open to the public, it offers a variety of membership packages, including out of state. Its membership benefit package includes, extended booking privileges up to six months in advance, reduced rates for a member's guest, social events, ladies clinics every Thursday, monthly newsletters, club charging privileges and USGA handicap system, just to name a few.

Just as most golf courses have a signature hole, let me highlight a couple of restaurants that serve their own stamp of approval.

Wintzell's Oyster House, which has two locations in Mobile, has a great mix of tasty eye-appealing food, but also a catchy décor of saucy sayings that prove there is a fine line between truth and comedy. Two phrases particularly caught by eve. The first was "Clothes don't make the man, but a good suit makes many a lawyer." Secondly, "A joint checking account is never overdrawn by the wife---it's under-deposited by the husband." Want more? You will just have to visit Wintzell's to get the full flavor of its many witty displays, while munching (or chewing) their world famous oysters. Aside from the great food, I sensed the allure of Mobile while leaving to the tune of a complete lunar eclipse. Needless to say, having gorged myself on Wintzell's multi-mouthwatering cuisine, I had no choice but to howl at the moon. (Rosemary on the other hand viewed it differently.) I was full, I was exhilarated, and I was in Mobile. What more could I ask for?

The following night, we experienced another taste of Mobile while dining at Roussos Restaurant. The character of the restaurant is reflected in the ownership: John, Jimmy and Georgia Roussos. Proud of their Greek heritage, the Roussos family served up the best tasting Gulf Seafood and Grecian style cuisine. Survivors (literally), two of their restaurants were lost to hurricanes, the present location which was once a carriage house and taxi hub, now features old Mobile brick and cedar walls, covered with photographs, awards and nostalgic memorabilia.

From their state of the art stainless steel 8,000 square foot kitchen, no stone has been left unturned to deliver their time honored award winning menu with something for everybody in their restaurant, including private banquet and conference rooms and full service catering division. Georgia and her brothers were great hosts, and more importantly, great people. To be a guest in their restaurant was an honor, and although all good things must come to an end, I will be back.

Did I mention that Mobile was going to the Dogs (racetrack, that is)? Our trip wouldn't have been complete without a trip to the Mobile Greyhound Park, that served food, drink and of course greyhound racing, at a quick betting pace, every twenty minutes. Aside from live racing, Mobile Greyhound Park has simulcast racing from venues across the nation. When in Mobile, put aside a few hours to enjoy the sights, sounds and smells that ensure a doggone great time. DOWN THE HOMESTRETCH - HEADING FOR HOME!

US Airways, our carrier of choice, we found their turbo props comfortable with an unparalleled safety record. At times, situations arise that need to be described. As I was returning from my "seat to my seat" from rising the 'toile,' the Captain of the plane passed me, to replace my former seated position, if you get my drift. My initial thought was, if he is currently indisposed "just who was flying the plane." As I glanced down the aisle, I noticed our flight attendant was now seated in the cockpit. Later, I just had to ask, "Who was flying the plane." She replied (with a wink), "Didn't you know, I wear many hats." As it turned out, there was a co-pilot out of sight, but it makes for a memorable story. Great airline. Great Sports!

Mobile has many other attractions to experience, that I am looking forward to visiting and writing about. The best way to describe Mobile, whether one plans to visit, live in, or retire to, one does not have to be upwardly mobile, just Mobile.

Places to Go:

Robert Trent Jones Golf Trail, Magnolia Grove, Mobile, AL, 251.645.0075
(click the image on the right to obtain the latest edition of the Robert Trent Jones Trail Guide)